Values and Voice: Musings of a Fox

So, I’m turning 31 at the end of this month. And people often talk about their 30s as being the decade when they abandoned the self-consciousness of their 20s. As the time when they relaxed into their own skin and began to live in a way that was more joy-filled and authentic. 

Interestingly, as the decade has turned for me, I can tell you that God and my age are, in fact, conspiring together to teach me some version of this.

I recently had a stranger at this beautiful creekside cafe in Queensland tell me that I embody the fox archetype in Celtic mythology. (Thanks, Jarrod.) I Googled it afterwards. (Thanks, Google.) And I was surprised at how accurately the descriptions I read captured something of my experience and the way I move through the world. 

Foxes in Celtic mythology, among other things of equal interest, are known for their adaptability; their behaviour and even their form shifts and changes in response to their environment, their audience, and their agenda. 

Now, you may not know me, but I have moved around quite a few times in my life. I’m also a pastor’s kid. And I used to be an actress when I was younger. Who knows exactly why, but I can tell you that adapting is something that I have learned how to do. It’s been a strength, and it has enabled me to connect more readily with other people in new environments. 

But adaptability as a default, as a first response, and above all else can come at a cost. 

It’s almost not adaptability anymore; it’s almost like ceasing to exist. 

I think there are many reasons we can become people who are adaptive as a first response or final decision. Some of these are good reasons–responsiveness to the needs of others, service, ministry, love, consideration, connection, generosity.

But if we do this without awareness of and appreciation for our own values and voice, we may become half-hearted, disconnected, and lost. 

Our values and voice are integral to who we are. And to deny their existence or their significance is to cease to be. And our being is God-given and God-blessed. He made us in His image and declared His creation “good.”

I must add here, knowing your values and voice does not mean you become ruled by them. You and God, together, get to decide what to do with them. 

You can stand on them, or you can lay them down. You get to decide how much space they occupy in any given moment. 

But to know them is to increase your capacity to connect with God, with others, and with what you choose to do. 

And if and when you feel led to make a decision that entails a compromise relating to your values and your voice, how much more healthy–and even powerful–is your “yes.”

There has been great joy, permission, and praise in this for me. 

It moves my heart that my God cares enough to engage me in this dialogue. 

And I wonder if there is something in it for you, too.

Here’s to my 30s. And to your…whatever decade you’re in.

May we live.